Writing resolutions for the New Year is one of my most favorite-est times of year. Once December 31st hits, the time has passed from the pressure-packed gift-giving holiday season, and relief has arrived where we can finally focus on the big year ahead - the fresh energy we have for it washing in like a wave.
As I became a mother - and I’m 12 years in now with 3 kids - the days get more cluttered with things to do to keep the family running. The days turn into minutes. Those small divisions of time are what we are left with in order to finish a thought or a sentence - just minutes between professional or family or personal events - to live our lives, grow our businesses, and make it all work on our terms. Very risky. Very stressful. Very fulfilling. We made this. You made this.
So for 2023, here’s how we are going to keep this. We are going to take the time - make the time - to write the resolutions. No matter what anyone says about resolutions sucking and not happening. At Tin Shingle, I used to make written time capsules. In some time capsule resolutions, I declared that I will eat less pasta and more rice (I just ate quinoa the other day!) and that I would explore writing fonts (I have since made menu signs for local businesses!).
This year, 2022, I initiated my divorce from a good person in order to keep my mental state and professional position in a good place. It was also an inspiration for the No Apology, Not Sorry article (regarding walking down the sidewalk…sometimes I couldn’t walk through my own hallway without stepping aside).
I worked hard - and continue to - to make this transition easy on my children. It involves compromise and confusion and hope. Everyone has their own story, and all of us have our own truths. We can only be true to that.
To keep our hearts full and crusade for happiness alive, here are my Resolutions for 2023. I always categorize them. I would love to hear yours too, to be inspired.
KIDS:
To wipe their own noses. Somehow, I am the only one that knows how to wipe their faces. And I’m not very consistent. My 12 year old prefers and insists on wiping her face on her clothing. Jeans, leggings, my own sweatshirt that she swiped. My 5 year old has a chronic runny nose, and the teachers can’t keep wiping it at school. He needs to learn how to do it himself. And anyway. His Kindergarten teacher asked parents via the monthly teacher newsletter that we let the kids zip their own coats, because in school, the kids are zipping their own coats because the teachers literally have no time to zip everyone’s coats. Here-Here, I agree, and thank you.
To make their own food. If I don’t make the kids their breakfast, they don’t eat it. This is ridiculous, because my 12 year old knows how to make her own English muffin with butter and raspberry jam, but prefers my special touch. My 10 year old insists on making his own scrambled eggs when the babysitter comes over, to show off, but suddenly has no time when it’s just him and me at home. They need to cook for themselves with my guidance if I am not there. After my divorce, which is still in its process but is in the mail, is that I heard from fellow mothers, who were also in frustrating positions, that they worried about their children not eating anything but pizza. That their parent partners might only ever feed their children pizza for 4 days in a row. Well. If that’s keeping you in a situation you don’t like, then empower your children to make the food they like. Today, to practice making their own lunch, my two little ones walked (maybe ran though I told them to walk) to the grocery store to buy their own bread. I’d offered to make them grilled cheeses. But they wanted the special bread they had at their grandparent’s house in Ohio over the winter holiday. Their Nonni had very special, squishy wheat bread that had a brand name that did not matter. So they wanted to buy the bread at the store, and bring it back for me to make.
PROFESSIONAL:
Understanding cash-flow and profit. Now that I have an employee, yet have always had long-time contractors, I need to understand how payroll is made, while bills are paid, and money is still in the bank for the next payroll and bills and investing in something if needed. I will hire a money manager to help me.
Show and Tell the kids I’m working. This is in the Professional section, because it’s dire to me working. Usually I hide my work, and work at night or in the bathroom or in the early morning. So that I can give them my undivided attention. But I get Nurses Scrubs Envy. Because nurses are on call and helping people in the office. When you have nurses scrubs on, you are in the job. No one questions it. I need to show my kids what I do - and it’s a lot - so that they understand what I do, and respect when I’m working on my laptop at soccer practice, and not watching every goal (but I watch all the goals at actual games, just not practices).
I think that’s enough for now. More Resolutions will come. But we can start here.
Happy New Year :)
xoxo